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January 31, 2012

Bullish: How to Make Money as an Artsy-Artist Commie Pinko Weirdo, Part I
by Liz McKeon - 0

By Contributor Jen Dziura 

This article originally appeared on TheGloss.

Have you ever read a “How to Get Ahead in Your Field in 90 Days or Less Using Negotiating Techniques/Mind Control/Fairy Dust” article or book and just sort of let the advice glance off, assuming that it doesn’t really apply to you because you don’t wear a suit and look like a businesslady stock photo?

I live on Wall Street, and once walked up out of the subway to see a movie being filmed on Wall Street. It was a Saturday, and all the besuited people were actors. It looked just like … well, a movie. Because everyone was very young and attractive, and also carrying briefcases — rich, shiny leather, or gleaming chrome. Briefcases. No one does that. Not even on Wall Street. This was some Platonic ideal of Wall Street, minus all the grumpy older men with bad skin and frowzy trenchcoats who try to cut the line at Starbucks.

Are you are imagining “business” exclusively the way it is portrayed in the movies, or — even better — the movies of your formative years? Like Wall Street or Boiler Room or even What Women Want (gross when it came out, and even grosser now, Mel Gibson). I have found myself doing this. For instance, certainly you’ve heard the advice to make friends with gatekeepers, to always be nice to the receptionist. It’s easy to see myself doing this on Mad Men. She has a beehive and a prim little suit and would like it if you sent flowers. But in real life, the person at the front desk is almost certainly a 23 year old who is always on Facebook. She is wearing leggings. So, yes, that is the person you are supposed to be nice to. (For the record, if I made less than $15 an hour, I would wear leggings too, just to stay sane.)

Read the rest at TheGloss.


Jennifer Dziura (jenniferdziura.com) writes career and life coaching advice for young women at TheGrindstone and TheGloss. She believes you can make money without being a douchebag. She believes in working harder and smarter now so you can have "balance" when you're wrinkly and covered in diamonds. She believes in starting businesses on zero dollars, selling expensive things to rich people, and laughing very hard at people who try to "manifest their dreams" without learning any real skills or shaping the fuck up. She likes to help. Jennifer also performs (sort of) educational one-woman shows about philosophy and punctuation. Her "The History of Women in 30 Minutes" is appearing in the Women in Comedy Festival.
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January 30, 2012

Here's Your 'Bridesmaids' Drinking Game for Your Monday Morning Hangover
by Liz McKeon - 0

By WICF Editor Liz McKeon

 Good morning!

 

 What, rough weekend?
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January 25, 2012

Are Mainstream Awards Important in Comedy?
by Liz McKeon - 1

By WICF Editor Liz McKeon

After yesterday's Academy Awards nominations were announced, I was excited to see Melissa McCarthy recognized, of course, and after her Emmy win I think it's safe to say she's having an incredibly good couple of seasons. It made me wonder about other comedians and comic actors and actresses and how they've done in the general entertainment awards categories. Then, I stumbled across Scott Mendelson's piece over at "The Huffington Post." Mendelson derides the treatment of what he calls "populist" entertainment:

"With as much respect as possible for Melissa McCarthy (who did her job and got laughs as the scene-stealing clown), her nomination as the biggest representation of the film is a sign that it was mostly written off as the 'girls shit in a sink' movie. A film filled with realistic and three-dimensional female characters received its only major acting nomination for its most over-the-top and least realistic character. I'm not trying to pick on McCarthy, I'm happy she'll be getting tons more work off of the success of the film, so if you want to see her ace a more three-dimensional role, track down The Nines. Or just check out the early seasons of "Gilmore Girls.""

Read the rest of the article here:
"The Lesson for This Year's Oscar Nominees? Don't Be an R-rated Film!"


What do you think about comedians, pop culture, and awards?
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January 24, 2012

Bullish: Using Your College Skills to Succeed After College
by Liz McKeon - 0

By Contributor Jen Dziura

This article originally appeared on TheGrindstone.

I always say that you shouldn’t take business advice from someone whose only business is giving business advice (Pyramids: Great shape for a pharaoh’s tomb, bad shape for a business model), and that multiple streams of income are crucial.

One of my businesses is offering educational comedy shows to universities — I do about six gigs a year — and this was how I recently found myself at sunny Palm Beach State University, where I had offered, since I was in town anyway, to speak to any college classes that wanted to have me. That turned out to be an introductory composition class.

My speaking topic is “Forging Your Own Career,” but I tend to do my public speaking a bit on the fly — you really just have to get a feeling for things once you get there. Colleges are more different from each other than nearly any other group of groups of people; there is no Chamber of Commerce that only takes the top 8% of businesses, and then some other Chamber of Commerce for people who couldn’t get into that Chamber of Commerce, and then a bunch of Chambers of Commerce full of people who were excluded from the other Chambers of Commerce for a host of financial and sociocultural reasons.


Read the rest at TheGrindstone.


Jennifer Dziura (jenniferdziura.com) writes career and life coaching advice for young women at TheGrindstone and TheGloss. She believes you can make money without being a douchebag. She believes in working harder and smarter now so you can have "balance" when you're wrinkly and covered in diamonds. She believes in starting businesses on zero dollars, selling expensive things to rich people, and laughing very hard at people who try to "manifest their dreams" without learning any real skills or shaping the fuck up. She likes to help. Jennifer also performs (sort of) educational one-woman shows about philosophy and punctuation. Her "The History of Women in 30 Minutes" is appearing in the Women in Comedy Festival.
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"Bachelorette" Premieres at Sundance, Draws Inevitable Comparisons
by Liz McKeon - 0

By WICF Editor Liz McKeon


Writer-Director Leslye Headland's movie based on her off-Broaday play premiered last night in Park City, and the comparisons are blowing up my inbox this morning: "Is Bachelorette a Bridesmaids rip-off? No? OK, then, will the general viewing public see it that way?" ... and so on, and so on, ad nauseam.


To be honest, I expected the next female-driven ensemble comedy to get the Bridesmaids comparison, because the movie-going audience has been trained to view comedies featuring women — hell, even all movies featuring women  as niche entries, and not as showcases for silver screen-representatives of roughly half the population. I just didn't expect the next big movie to be a movie about bridesmaids. Makes my job standing on this soapbox a little bit harder. 
Photo from theberry.com.


I'll stand up here anyway, though. If a comedy can't cover the ground around what is purported to be one of life's seminal events without being called a copy, well, what I have to say is that weddings have been covered in film before, and they'll be covered again. As The New York Times reports, Headland told the Sundance press, “I admit that I am a little concerned about expectations ... My movie is nasty, dark, complicated and a little bizarre. If people come in expecting Bridesmaids they may have a heart attack. Or they might hate it and leave.”

Reuters makes their peace with the film by invoking the name of the great master of generationally iconic, yet in-hindsight-remarkably-un-P.C. '80s odes to the Baby Boomers, John Hughes. “I was mad our generation didn’t have an iconic movie, so I decided to make one,” [Headland] said at the Eccles Theater, wearing a studded black dress that could have walked out of the 1980s. “I wanted to make a movie for us, about people like us. Isla is really just a drunk Molly Ringwald."


After reading the initial responses from the press, I'm struck by the thought that they're doing exactly what I'm doing, just for a less women-centered audience. They're trying to head off the comparisons before those critiques can really take root. Comedies by and about women should be presented as comedies first, and, hopefully, we're getting to that place. In the end, I think the quote The L.A. Times' movie blog "24 Frames" says it best, "The director told 24 Frames before the festival she didn't mind the comparison as much as you might think: "I look at it a little like Bonnie & Clyde in 1967," she said. "You have a movie that gets everyone's attention and all these comparisons are drawn, and they're not always right. But then it's like, 'Thank God, let's make more movies like that.'"
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January 20, 2012

Finding the Funny: Books You NEED to Read in Your Lifetime
by Liz McKeon - 0


By Contributor Allison Haskins


The two things I love most in the world are reading and comedy. When I stumble upon the wonderful gems that incorporate both, my heart starts doing backflips and shooting off tiny fireworks. OK, so maybe I’m just a book nerd who happens to have a fantastic sense of humor … either way, I know what I’m talking about and you need to trust me.

In hopes that someday you can be as enthralled with your literary choices as I am, I have compiled a list of some of my favorite funnies. Do with this information what you will, but if you take the time to read them (and it should be fairly easy with computers, Kindles, iPhones, iPads, and, last but not least — actual books!), you will not regret it. 

***


Hypocrite in a Poufy White Dress
 by Susan Jane Gilman

This book is actually a New York Times Bestseller, so if you haven’t read it, stop what you’re doing (after this paragraph of course) and go get it! To sum it up, it’s a memoir-style book about growing up and how ridiculous life retrospectively was. Susan Jane Gilman does an amazing job at portraying herself and her life in a fresh and hilarious way, partly because her life itself has been quite a crazy ride. She covers it all — from being a conniving 5-year-old, to a rebellious and hopeless teenager, and then an adult who is still just as lost and confused as she was when she was 15. Yet, through it all, she maintains humor and hope that things will somehow turn around and maybe even reach normalcy. 


Laugh Line: “… while other kids my age were preparing for confirmations and bat mitzvahs, I’d developed a relationship with God that consisted solely of begging for breasts.”

***

My Horizontal Life by Chelsea Handler

Chelsea Handler has been gaining celebrity by leaps and bounds over the past couple years, yet people who aren’t huge Handler fans may have missed her first book, which she wrote before anyone even knew who she was. As it might appear from the title, this book is, in fact, a chronicle of Handler’s one night stands during her late teens and 20s. If you don’t laugh out loud at her crazy thoughts, actions, and debauchery, something is wrong with you. 


Laugh Line: “I couldn’t afford a run-in with this guy in front of my new suitor. There were only three things he could bring up: my vagina, his anus, and his Ecstasy that I stole.”


***






After a very young Stephanie Wilder moved to California in an attempt to start over, chaos ensued in various forms before she was able to get on the straight and narrow. She details experiences including competing on a game show, experimenting with drugs, and working as a telemarketer. Throughout the book, Wilder is bitterly honest in discussing a rough life in which she’s made a lot of mistakes, but each step of the way she’s able to look back, with humor, on what she has been and done. 

Laugh Line: “She made the face women make when they discover they’ve accidentally been drinking regular Coke instead of Diet.”


***


This is one of a handful of books by Lancaster, all of which are equally amazing. Self described as a raging narcissist, she also battles with job problems, weight issues, relationship ups and downs, and shitty neighbors. The mix of these troubles, along with her abnormally high self-esteem, results in a hilarity that the average person never gets to experience. Maybe I’m the weird one, but when I finished these books, I really and truly wanted to be friends with Lancaster and get to better understand what goes on in her batshit crazy head. 

Laugh Line: “I’m back on Atkins today. For lunch I had one and a half Burger King Texas Whoppers minus the bun. Shameful.”


***


I Don't Care About Your Band: What I Learned from Indie Rockers, Trust Funders, Pornographers, Faux-Sensitive Hipsters, and Other Guys I've Dated by Julie Klausner 

In short, Klausner is a Jewish, redheaded, promiscuous gal who enjoys the occasional high. As a late bloomer in the guy department, she had to make up for lost time! Her book is a compilation of experiences including bad first dates, loving losers, searching for Mr. Right (or Right Now), and all the amusing mishaps that happen in between. Also, you should check out her podcast, How Was Your Week, for a dose of funny every seven days. (A tip of the hat to WICF Contributor Barbara Holm for also loving Klausner!) 


Laugh Line: “During my last year at college, I decided to open my horizons, which is a fancy word for ‘legs.’”

***


As corny as it may sound, I connect to these titles in large part because all of these women talk about the issues they have in their lives ­­­­­­­­­­­­— relationships, jobs, money, family — things that we all have to deal with. However, they have turned all these things into jokes, shedding light on serious and often sad, hurtful, or frustrating situations. All of these funny ladies have helped me to try to stop taking things so seriously and ultimately, to take the time to find the funny. 


All book photos by Amazon.com.



Allison Haskins holds a Journalism degree and is a freelance comedy writer.  In her spare time, the Massachusetts native attends as many stand-up shows as possible and listens to every comedy podcast she can get her hands on. Follow Allison on Twitter at Twitter.com/Alliehaskins.
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Festival Acceptances Have Been Announced
by Liz McKeon - 0

All submissions emails have been sent out. Applicants were notified whether or not they were accepted to the festival. 

If you applied and do not receive an email in the next few hours, please contact submissions@womenincomedyfestival.com as soon as possible. We've been experiencing some technical difficulties and we want to make sure that no one slipped through the cracks.

We want to thank all of you who applied. We had twice the number of submissions this year which made the process even more competitive. We appreciate all the hard work and talent you've all put into your comedy.

WICF2011 was real good-looking!
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January 19, 2012

That Comedian’s Girlfriend
by Liz McKeon - 0

By WICF Contributor Barbara Holm

Today Eddie Brill got fired for saying he doesn't think women comedians are authentic. I don’t celebrate anyone losing a job, but I am glad that there is some accountability for sexism in comedy. The stigma against women in comedy is diminishing. The best way we can change the perception of women in comedy is to be as funny as possible, keep working and help other funny women by booking them as often as we can.

"My unsolicited advice to women in the workplace is this. When faced with sexism … ask yourself the following question: "Is this person in between me and what I want to do?" If the answer is no, ignore it and move on. Your energy is better used doing your work, and outpacing people that way." -Tina Fey, Bossypants

I'm not surprised by Brill's comment. I know the demographic Letterman caters toward. But when everyone jumped down his throat, Brill dug his own grave whilst trying to defend himself. The very funny Amy Schumer told a reporter something to the extent that it seems like he doesn't book a lot of women. Eddie Brill's response was, "That comedian's girlfriend made up facts."

That comedian's girlfriend has her own Comedy Central presents and her own album. Brill apologized for identifying Amy that way so I'm not mad at him, but more so at the institutionalized sentiment I've seen from many comedy club bookers and members of the industry. I hate that if two comedians date, the woman is viewed as an extension of the man.

A few years ago I heard a club manager say to a friend of mine that the only reason women perform stand up is to get to date a male comic. Like male comics are some sort of prize that everyone wants? I don't think anyone throws themselves into the world of painful open mics, staying out late, and getting criticized while making no money just to meet someone. I am not doing stand up to get laid. That is offensive not only to women but to the art form of comedy.

"If you're gonna risk your reputation fucking comics, I suggest you pick funny ones." -Bonnie McFarlene, Shecky Magazine

The inverse has happened to me a few times, because I'm like, so pretty. (Sarcasm!) When I first started, one comedian told me that I would do well because I could fuck my way onto shows. I am really sensitive about the idea of a comedy groupie or anyone using their sexuality as an asset to get stage time. I’m not riding on my feminine wiles to enhance any aspect of my career and it makes me uncomfortable to think that anyone could or would do that. I guess the 'who you are dating' card may hold some smidgen of weight, but just as much as the 'who you are friends with' card and neither card works long term if you aren't funny.

Many of my comic girlfriends have been asked out, hit on, or flirted with by male comics, and that doesn't make them any more or less funny. It is inevitable when you're out every single night, clumped together for hours in a green room, drinking and talking. It happens. I developed a defense mechanism: when a male comic I don’t know talks to me, I retreat into a metaphoric turtle shell. It’s effective, but I don’t recommend it.

Women should never be defined as an extension of someone they’re dating, especially in regards to their value as an artist. So, if you see two comics dating, try to bite back the gossip jumping out of your mouth. If they’re funny, who cares? Don’t talk shit, and be as supportive of women as possible. If they are however in the small tragic minority of women who aren’t funny, the small group who do ride the casting couch, just ignore them. They will go away.

I guess my point regarding dating a comic is simply to be funny. Going back to what Tina said about institutionalized sexism, just ignore it and focus on getting funnier. That’s the bottom line. One of my best friends and comedy heroes gave the best advice ever: "I get worked up about that shit and then it's like you can't control what some idiots think. So, just work hard, prove them wrong, and make them hate themselves more" -Rylee Newton.


Barbara Holm is a stand-up comedian from Seattle, Washington. She has performed at Bridgetown Comedy Festival, The Women in Comedy Festival, and Bumbershoot Festival. She has been described as clever, creative and unique.
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My Life as Told by the Shit I Left in My Parents’ Basement: Why Traveling Back Home Always Makes Me Feel Kind of Weird
by Liz McKeon - 0


By Guest Contributor Christa Weiss


Coming home is always a bit strange for me. Really strange, actually. The last time I visited my parents, I opened the door and immediately found my brother’s bull dog, Dudley mauling my old teddy bear, ironically, also named Dudley. 



 It was in this mildly traumatic way, that I was informed it was time to go through all those boxes I had left in the basement. My dad had a desperate need to create a suitable man-cave and I sure as hell wasn’t going to stop him. 


 Suddenly, I delved into a couple of nostalgia drenched hours, which I’m told is a thing you should care about. Say what you will about the preciousness of childhood memories and how the past might shape me as a comedian, that kind of stuff makes me feel vastly uncomfortable. My family and I are German, which means that we are largely incapable of any human emotion, aside from quiet resentment. (I thought I felt remorse once, but it turns out I was just PMSing.) 


 Thus I present to you a journey through my childhood, as told by the shit I left in my parents’ basement. 


Ages 3-6 


I discover what I’m pretty sure is my very first baby doll. He’s held up well. I should clarify something. He was born a she. And by born I mean manufactured. Ok, it had a girl’s name on the box but I, like so many parents intent on fucking up their children, raised him as a boy. I called him Harry, so it’s obvious I wanted a real man. I didn’t go for some sort of pussy name like Todd. I was a remarkably astute child.  


I thought it was ridiculous for a baby to be wearing just a diaper and nothing else so I goaded my grandmother into making some clothes for him. What I got were some pink crochet pants and a jaunty Hawaiian shirt with no buttons, so you could always see his manly-baby chest. When I got older I made him an outfit of my own, which ended up being a makeshift karate uniform. I made him a black belt. Looking back, it might have made more sense if I had a Miami Vice action fig-ure instead of a baby doll but then I’d need my grandmother to crochet a matching blazer. 


“Sorry Mom. This one’s a keeper.” 




Ages 6-12 


Various failed art projects. A scrunchi with googley eyes. The unicorn pin I used to put on my shirt every day, an inordinate amount of My Little Ponies and a Barbie winnebago. Nope, my Barbie didn’t have a sexy pink convertible and a dream house, she had them COMBINED TOGETHER in a vehicle that sucks at both of those things. My Barbies weren’t the kind of girls to spend frivolously. Even back then, the economy was shitty. 


“Look, I’m keeping at least one pony. I know, I know, but look how pretty her rainbow hair is. Yeah. That’s what I thought.” (I take the pony and slip the unicorn pin into my pocket in the hopes that unicorns are still lame enough to be considered cool.) 




Ages 12-16 


Scores of old sketchbooks. A lot of really embarrassing teenage suicide poetry. It’s amazing home many different ways I manage to put together “dies” and “your lies.” 


A couple of weird photos including one of my friend Kristin laying on the floor with a bottle of sparkling grape juice, pretending to be drunk. 


“Burn the poetry. Keep the photo for the purpose of irony.” 




Ages 16-18 


My years as a kleptomaniac. I should clarify that I specifically stole useless non-merchandise. I guess I just liked the rush. 1 Scores of aisle marker signs from the grocery store, a giant orange road pylon, one of those short cylindrical box things that they keep tortillas in and about six bath-rooms signs from the Jefferson Road Regal Cinema 8. We made of game of stealing them and then watching people who couldn’t figure out which bathroom to use get pissed off. It got to the point where the management had to start nailing down the signs at the movie theatre. It was a proud moment for me. 


Next, a couple of beautifully tragic prom photos. Fate does not shine on high school relation-ships. Neither does making out for hours in your boyfriend's mom’s basement and expecting to not get caught. 


“Okay most of this is useless garbage but I’m keeping the bathroom signs…and I guess those prom photos...but only the ones where I’m flipping off the camera.” 




Ages 18-22 


A bunch of crap from when I went to art school. About 100 rubber duckies. A couple of tragic handwritten love letters from a few misguided exes. A photograph of only a bruised bare arm and chest from the one of those aforementioned exes. I think he was showing off how punk rock he was by displaying how he got the shit beaten out of him at some show he went to. We wore bruises like badges of honor but what we really should have done was go to the hospital. Head injuries are kind of a big deal. 


Another photo of my friend Kristin, drunk for real this time. 


“Out go the shitty art projects. Those love notes are too pathetic to keep around so I’ll just throw them away without reading them. The photo of my bruised up ex is funny but only if you’re a jaded ex-punk rocker. I don’t want to look like a sadist, so that goes too. I’ll take the photo of Kristin and frame it alongside the other one for comparative purposes. You can really tell how the vomit dripping out of the corner of her mouth makes the second one seem so much more re-alistic.” (I find out later that Kristin is mad at me.) 




Ages 22-Uugh who cares anyway? (I guess this is kind of the reflection part.) 


I begrudgingly realize that at 22 years old I had much more money than I do now, at 28. Fuck it, I think. I get to perform at comedy clubs hidden in a variety of basements and attics every night, draw funny pictures for a living2 and have not one, but two different blogs. That’s right, MULTIPLE blogs. Truly, I have achieved cultural transcendence.3 My teenage self would think I was a goddess. At the very least I’m not constantly tripping on cough syrup anymore,4 so that’s something. 


Looking back this way made me realize my life could have taken me in two very different directions: 
1. Me, living as comedian/artist/writer/all purpose neurotic residing in Boston 
2. Me living as comedian/artist/writer/all purpose neurotic residing in an asylum 


All in all it looks like I’m winning. 


 *** 


I finish up in the basement and ask to borrow the car so I can the meet Kristin at Java’s, our fa-vorite coffee shop. My friends and I virtually lived there in high school. 


Because I don’t drive frequently, my parents are convinced I will crash their stupid minivan into a drainage ditch and die in a fiery blaze. I explain to them that I can definitely handle driving in the suburbs because when I do drive, it’s in a large city. Cruising around downtown Boston is the equivalent of being chased by a giant tiger while walking on a tightrope.5 Also, unless you’ve been knocked into a coma, I’m pretty sure it’s impossible to forget how to drive. This doesn’t seem to make a difference to them and they insist on taking me there. 


I sulk in the car like a teenager as my dad chauffeurs me to Java’s. Bah! This is more nostalgia than I can handle. 


I ask him to drop me off a block away from the coffee place so the cool kids who are smoking outside don’t see that I’m being dropped off by my dad. It’s around then that I realize the only thing in my life that has changed is that I am less responsible and capable of living like an adult than when I was a teenager. The American Dream, she has been realized. 


“And…uh seriously Dad, when you come pick me you can just call me. Don’t come into the cof-fee shop and yell my name really loudly, then walk around asking the hipster kids that work there if they’ve seen me, just for old time’s sake. It’s weird.” 




1. Rush from stealing later replaced by drugs. 
2. A living if you count unemployment. 
3. Along with everyone else, especially a lot of 14 year old girls that really hate their parents, love Justin Beiber and think what that asshole Kanye did to Taylor Swift was just awful! 
4. In truth, I really only did that once but let me tell you, it was unpleasant. 
5. I believe that driving in Manhattan is the equivalent of being chased by a herd of T-rexes that shoot rabid flying cobras of their mouths during an earthquake, but I could be mistaken.





Christa is a comedian, artist, writer and all around snappy dresser living in Boston. Christa participated Women in Comedy Festival and performs in clubs all over Boston, New England and New York. She has a comedy/design blog at www.shamelesspompandcircumstance.blogspot.com and co-authors a food blog at www.suppersanityclub.blogspot.com.
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January 17, 2012

Bullish: Are You Thinking Too Small?
by Liz McKeon - 0

By Contributor Jen Dziura

This article originally appeared on TheGrindstone.

Ever since I first figured out how a screwdriver works (you don’t necessarily need to drill holes first — you can screw stuff straight into drywall!), it has occurred to me that there are plenty of really easy things that men are “better” at for absolutely no good reason. Aside from basic tool use, these may include parallel parking, map reading, and catching a gently tossed baseball or football. While it’s possible that men and women have cognitive differences at least in part caused by biology, I’m talking about really basic skills, here; however much either gender lags behind in such skills is clearly cultural. And I’d like to talk about a specific part of that cultural divide: the power of embarrassment.

Why are most American men pretty good at parallel parking, map reading, and catching things? Because if you are a man, it’s humiliating to be bad at these things. However, it is not terribly embarrassing to be bad at these things if you are a woman. Since the natural human condition is laziness, men have more motivation to gain these skills.

I think there is a very similar “embarrassment gap” between men and women about money and business. I think many women think too small because they’re not embarrassed by it, whereas men are forced to think bigger — in part for the obvious reasons (money, glory), but in part just to avoid shame.

Read the rest at TheGrindstone.


Jennifer Dziura (jenniferdziura.com) writes career and life coaching advice for young women at TheGrindstone and TheGloss. She believes you can make money without being a douchebag. She believes in working harder and smarter now so you can have "balance" when you're wrinkly and covered in diamonds. She believes in starting businesses on zero dollars, selling expensive things to rich people, and laughing very hard at people who try to "manifest their dreams" without learning any real skills or shaping the fuck up. She likes to help. Jennifer also performs (sort of) educational one-woman shows about philosophy and punctuation. Her "The History of Women in 30 Minutes" is appearing in the Women in Comedy Festival.
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Notifications Will Be Out by Thursday
by Liz McKeon - 0

By WICF Editor Liz McKeon

We love our spiffy new applications site, but it's been experiencing some growing pains as of late. To all of the comics who applied for this year's Women in Comedy Festival, we ask you to hold tight for just a little longer. We'll have responses out to you by Thursday.

If anything changes, we'll announce it on Twitter, Facebook, and the homepage news feed. We're sorry to keep you waiting!
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January 14, 2012

Geeking Out With ... Elyse Schuerman
by Pam Victor - 0

By WICF Contributor Pam Victor 


[“Geeking Out with ... ” 
is a series of interviews with well-known, highly experienced improvisers. It’s a chance to talk about stuff that might interest hardcore, improv dorkwads like me. For an extended, full-frontal geek-out version of this interview, please visit my blog, My Nephew is a Poodle.]
  
Elyse Schuerman is co-producer of the Women in Comedy Festival, which has grown exponentially each year thanks to the efforts and good karma of Elyse and her co-producers and festival creators Michelle Barbera and Maria Ciampa. Elyse’s improv comedy roots firmly are planted in the fertile soil of ImprovBoston where she worked as Managing Director from 2003-08. In addition, Elyse has been a Mainstage ImprovBoston cast member since 1999, performed in a vast number of shows there (such as Bluescreen, Comedia d'ell High School, BackStory, and Gorefest I-V), directed (Micetro, UnNatural Selection, Trail Mix), as well as taught improv to students lucky enough to learn under her sweet, knowledgeable and generous tutelage.

An IB romance got legal when Elyse married improviser and teacher extraordinaire Don Schuerman. Three years ago, they  joined the IB procreation parade with the birth of their first child, and just a few months ago their son joined the ranks of sure-to-be-funny IB babies. In order to accommodate our crazy mother-comedian-everything else schedules, Elyse and I sandwiched our improv geek out session during a stolen hour on a Tuesday morning as the newborn on her lap held an animated discussion with the ceiling fan and as I monitored the studies of my 15-year-old homeschooled son via Google chat and the old-fashioned method of hollering upstairs. The hurried, hilarious experience seemed profoundly apt as that rush-rush-improvise-rush-rush tempo is what being an improv comedian mother is all about.


Pam Victor: I'm always interested in how people found improv - or how improv found them. When did you first get into it? Was it love at first sight?

Elyse Schuerman: I saw a show at the SAK Comedy Lab in Orlando while I was in college in Florida during a theater festival, and it was amazing. It was a Theatresports-style show and the performers were great. I also remember an episode of Reading Rainbow that had Second City or something like that on the show. As a kid, I thought that was pretty cool. I got involved with IB [ImprovBoston] through a friend/co-worker who got in to Theatresports.

Pam: Reading Rainbow? So Geordi La Forge turned you on to improv?

Elyse: Exactly.

Pam: I can see how you would be powerless in the face of that. Resistance is futile. (That's a Star Trek joke that I would expect you to be too cool to get.)

Elyse: Ha! Oh, I have seen my share of Star Trek. We all have a little inner nerd, don't we?

Pam: Particularly improvisers.

Elyse: Yes!
This is Elyse.
She is very nice. 
Pam: So in college you were exposed to improv, but you didn't start taking classes until you got to Boston?

Elyse: Well, I never "took a class.” It was 1999 and IB was looking to cast some women.
My friend Kristy, who was involved there, told me about the auditions. I think before that, they were in need of a tech person for a show one night, so I volunteered since I could operate a light board...especially an eight channel light board. (Inner geek.) So, I had done tech once, seen her perform a couple of times, and then went in to audition. I was a theater major, so I had done some improv games. I made it in along with a few other ladies. We rehearsed twice a week, and I learned a lot from Mat Gagne and Ron Jones, who were my directors.

Pam: How did you get from that first team to working there?

Elyse: I was on the B team at the time, which meant we rehearsed on our own and with the main troupe…and then Will Luera came on as Artistic Director, and that is when things got really good at IB. The B team just became a part of the main troupe under Will's direction, and attended the Chicago Improv Festival. I really started to "get it."

Pam: Did you go through the levels at that point or just get your learning on the stage?

Elyse: Just from the stage and watching a lot of improv. Both of those things really shaped me. I think workshops are great in the same way rehearsing is great, but to really become a good performer, you have to perform - in front of an audience
and a lot.

At my peak I was performing, rehearsing, and directing six nights a week.

Pam: I'm drooling.

Elyse: Sometimes seven.

Pam: Ok, now I’m doing more than drool…

Elyse: Sexy improv talk!

All that experience was great and really trained me. Again, practice and thinking about it all the time are keys to succeeding.

Pam: Thinking about what exactly? What is the angle about improv that connects you to good performing?

Elyse: For me, it was analyzing what made other performers good. And I talked about it a lot with my roommate at the time, who was also an improviser (and then of course my husband, then boyfriend.) In addition, our conversations were like improv games - not all of them, but many. It's hard to turn it off, I think.

Pam: More sexy improv talk.

Elyse: To make it sexier, I will take off my pants...oh wait, there is a sleeping baby on my lap….

I came to realize that commitment was really the key to success. No matter what you chose at the top of the scene, hold on to it, like it's your lifeline.

I learned a lot from watching students and the performers I directed too…and the ones that committed were the best. And commitment also means, "If that's true, what else is true?" So, if you start as a pirate and your scene partner sets you up in an office, you find all the ways to be a pirate there. After being disgusted by the copy machine, you throw it overboard, you ask for your paycheck in gold coins, etc.

Also, always be a pirate.

(No, don't really. Pirates are so five years ago.)

Pam: LOL!

I guess I'm trying to get to the core of your improv skills set.

Elyse: My skills or bag of tricks are trying to anchor or commit at the top. And try to complement my scene partners on stage.

Pam: ImprovBoston seems to be a theater that really values the contributions of female comedians. At least from my outsider’s perspective, the theater seems to be very successful in balancing women and men on stage, and the whole environment there is very unified and cohesive. First of all, do you agree? And secondly, if so, how did the theater get to that place?

Elyse: I totally agree, though I don't think it worked too hard to do it. I think more and more ladies started taking classes and shined just as much as the men (per capita). And then they just started coming into the casts. I think Will, Don [Schuerman], Matt Mosher and my other IB contemporaries were so open to diversity too. They didn't just cast people they were friends with.

(Hang on…baby crying.)

Pam: Sure.

Elyse: I know we were very aware of how troupes were stacked. We all wanted to see equal balance in the genders; but as more ladies performed, more were taking classes and getting in to troupes. I think now it's just a fact that 50% of the folks who audition and are good are women.

WICF Producer Goddesses
Elyse Schuerman, Michelle Barbera, Maria Ciampa
Pam: Let’s talk about the Women in Comedy Festival! What lead to its creation?

Elyse: Michelle and Maria proposed it to IB when I was Managing Director, and we said yes to producing it. The next year, after I left the Managing Director position, I came on as a third producer. (I asked to be a part of it, as I totally loved it and the ladies.) It is a great festival, and not just for the ladies to perform in. We felt the name would attract female performers, and it has, but we are open to both genders. It ends up flipping the usual male to female ratio. And I am getting to meet my favorite female comedians - that is good!

Pam: What have you learned from being exposed to all these great female comedians?

Elyse: I've learned a lot more about the industry than I wanted, but it's been fun. I think it's hard to be a woman comic who wants to write for TV.

(Sorry, major baby spit up, here...)

Listening to how it all works at the panel discussions, I mean. No one griped, but it's a rigorous process.

Pam: Yeah, those panel discussions are an incredibly - and to me surprisingly - valuable part of the festival.

Elyse: Yeah, our goal is to keep them free to the public - an important part of the festival, for sure.

Pam: I know you’re still early in the process right now, but can you give us a sneak peek into what to expect from the next WICF (March 21-25, 2012)?

Elyse: We had double the submissions, so some awesome talent will be there. We will be adding some new and exciting venues. And one of our confirmed headliners is Carol Leifer, who I LOVED when I was a pre-teen when she had a show on A&E and she was fantastic. She still is, but she was my first introduction to stand up so it is pretty cool.
She has done so much writing for TV and producing too, so it will be interesting to hear her talk about it.

We will have more headliners this year... Keep looking at www.womenincomedyfestival.com for exciting announcements! (That's my commercial in this interview.)

Pam: That's SO exciting, Elyse. What you ladies are doing is so important and I think it will have implications on the improv world on the national and maybe even international scale. How do you feel about the state of women in comedy today?

Elyse: I think it's the best it has ever been. I think the final glass ceiling is seeing [more] women writers and directors in comedy. We need to push our numbers there. We have plans to see that happen, or at least make some impact in that area. (We hope.)

***

Read the extended version of this interview and others in the "Geeking Out with..." series at My Nephew is a Poodle

Photo credit: Jeff Hausthor
Pam Victor is the founding member of The Ha-Ha’s, and she producesThe Happier Valley Comedy Shows. Pam directs, produces and performs in the hot, new comic soap opera web series "Silent H, Deadly H". Pam also writes mostly humorous, mostly true essays and reviews of books, movies and tea on her blog,"My Nephew is a Poodle."

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January 12, 2012

The Ideal Receptionist, As Imagined by the Older White Man on the Other End of the Phone
by Liz McKeon - 0


By WICF Contributor Barbara Holm


"Yeah, I do have weekend plans. And furthermore I feel totally
comfortable sharing them with a stranger."

"Oh my gosh, you got an attorney's voicemail? I cannot believe it! The
only possible explanation is that sinister wrongdoings have
transpired. Let me scour the building, nay, the world for him! No, of
course I won't put you on hold; I have a Bluetooth, sorry, sorry I
mean a magical wizard hat. I apologize for confusing you with my loud,
brassy slang. Just one second while I train this flamingo to cover the
front desk while I find your attorney, because I have nothing else to
do."

"You're right, I do have a slight lisp. Yes, it is hilarious that you
pointed out an obvious physical handicap of mine. Hahaha!"

"Yes, it is cold outside. It's good that weather happens."

"No, I didn't just accidentally call you “Dad,” sir ... I said, “rad.”"

"I AM in fact eating something! You caught me! Now you win a prize
elephant named Albert. Yeah, I know you really wanted that prize,
otherwise why else would a stranger identify my snack consumption?"

"So, you don't know who you're calling for, you're not sure if they
have ever worked at this office, and you haven't talked with them in
40 years, but you know that he/she played golf once with an Asian man?
Yes, I know exactly of whom you speak."

"Oh, fascinating."

“Wait a minute, are you telling me that you tried to call someone and
they didn’t call you back? WHAT MADNESS IS THIS PLACE?!”

"My voice sounds too childlike? Thank you so much for telling me!
Because I have complete control over it, so obviously I appreciate any
and all constructive feedback."

"Sorry, they aren't in the office at the moment. Oh, they're expecting
you? This. Changes. Everything."

"Good afternoon, thank you for calling- oh, er, um, Barbara ... Oh
really, that's your mom's name? How interesting. Yes, I do know her.
From the Great War."

"Of course I remember you from when you called two months ago."

"Wow, thank you so much for asking how my day is going! Someone in
this miserable world does care! I am going to telegram my mother to
tell her that I do matter. Sure, we wasted a few seconds of our lives
with small talk, but I'll make that time back tonight tenfold because
I won't have to lock myself in the bathroom and cut a tiny notch in my
arm!"

"No, TGIF to you, sir. TGIF to you."



Barbara Holm is a stand-up comedian from Seattle, Washington. She has performed at Bridgetown Comedy Festival, The Women in Comedy Festival, and Bumbershoot Festival. She has been described as clever, creative and unique.
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January 10, 2012

Bullish: When To Make Massive And Ballsy Life Changes For Your Career
by Liz McKeon - 0

By Contributor Jen Dziura

This article originally appeared on TheGloss.

I love talking about being “ballsy.”

Testicles are very delicate – very important, yes, but also very delicate. Like, say, eyeballs. Important, but quite fragile! Yet no one ever says “Eyeballs out, ladies! Let’s do this!”

So, when is it important to be ballsy? More specifically, when is it time to make massive life changes to get ahead?

There was once a time that I worried I was clinically depressed and would require medication I could not afford. After all, depression is a disease, right? It’s all chemicals in your brain? Clearly, sometimes, that is the case. It is especially not difficult to understand that the drastic hormonal changes related to pregnancy and childbirth might marinate a person’s cerebellum in liquid melancholia.

But, in my case, I was running a failing company in a dead-end town, I couldn’t pay my bills, I hadn’t had fun in (actual) years, my landlord was threatening to evict my startup, and I had cut out exercising and friendships in order to make more time to fail at things. So, I don’t think that was a case of my brain randomly deciding to make some depressing chemicals. I think that was a very rational reason to be bummed out.

Read the rest at TheGloss.


Jennifer Dziura (jenniferdziura.com) writes career and life coaching advice for young women at TheGrindstone and TheGloss. She believes you can make money without being a douchebag. She believes in working harder and smarter now so you can have "balance" when you're wrinkly and covered in diamonds. She believes in starting businesses on zero dollars, selling expensive things to rich people, and laughing very hard at people who try to "manifest their dreams" without learning any real skills or shaping the fuck up. She likes to help. Jennifer also performs (sort of) educational one-woman shows about philosophy and punctuation. Her "The History of Women in 30 Minutes" is appearing in the Women in Comedy Festival.
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Women in Comedy Showcase Tonight at 8!
by Liz McKeon - 0

By WICF Editor Liz McKeon


Why wait until March for your dose of funny females? Boston fans can catch the "Women in Comedy Showcase" as tonight's "ImprovBoston Presents" feature!
Tonight's host, WICF Co-Producer Maria Ciampa


Don't fret if you're not in the Bay State right now (she types from her home in IL) — we'll do it all over again March 6, a mere two weeks (and a day) before WICF2012 opens! [Edited to add: We regret that, in fact, you should fret if you didn't make this showcase, because the March 6 one is no longer on the schedule. We also regret misleading our readers, depriving them of the chance to experience this particular instance of hilarity, and whatever other various and sundry things bother our good readers, such as war, famine, and Tebow.]

Hosted by Maria Ciampa, a fabulous Tuesday night (8 o'clock sharp!) of comedy with our favorite funny people:

Theresa Condito 
Kate Ghiloni 
Shawn Carter
Nate Johnson
Gary Peterson
Laura Crawford
Erika Kreutziger
Shawn Donovan

For tickets: http://www.improvboston.com/shows/improvboston-presents
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January 9, 2012

WICF Performers on Best Of Lists!
by Liz McKeon - 0

By WICF Editor Liz McKeon


We're excited that WICF Alumnae Allison Grillo and Chantal Carerre were featured in The Advocate as two of the “Seven Funny LGBT Comics You Should Not Have Missed in 2011.”


Congrats to WICF Alumna Jami Smith, her Twitter feed for The Advocate, @Gaysayer, was featured on both SheWired.com and Gay.Net as one of the "Top 25 LGBT Twitter Accounts." You can catch Jami at Gotham Comedy Club next month, for details see her site, www.jamismithcomedy.com.



2012 is shaping up to be a bang-up year for funny ladies!

“Seven Funny LGBT Comics You Should Not Have Missed in 2011” http://www.advocate.com/Arts_and_Entertainment/Comedy/7_Funny_LGBT_Comics_You_Shouldn%E2%80%99t_Have_Missed_in_2011/

"These Lesbians Have Nice Tweets" http://www.shewired.com/lifestyle/2011/12/28/these-lesbians-have-nice-tweets

"Top 25 Twitters To Follow" http://www.gay.net/celebrities/2011/12/30/top-25-twitters-follow-2012-mindy-kaling-gaysayer-rupaul-jesse-tyler 
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